The genius of people I work with never ceases to amaze me. This applies to all of my former places of employment, not just my current one. And really, I have to feel sorry for the guy. His wife leaves him, trashes him, and then comes whining back. He takes her back, no questions asked. Then she decides she wants to leave again, but this time she needs money. So he buys his own furniture from her. And he lets her live in his house, free of charge, while she looks for a new place. And he puts the deposit down on her new apartment. And he gives her anything in the house she wants, even the $1500 digital camera/camcorder that she never uses. And ... well, you get the picture. The thing is, after 24 years of marriage, he loves her more than he ever did. It does not matter what she does to him, what she tells their son about him, or how much she screws him over. He loves her.

When they were married he would buy her flowers once a week. Every week. No matter what. He bought her anything and everything that she could ever want. Her great-aunt's very expensive dining set. Sure. Another $700 digital camera and printer set up? Why not! What about that Camero we saw? Would you like that? Enough! I'm thinking, 'If this man wasn't almost 50 ...'

I am sure he has his faults, aside from the obvious stepping stone mentality, but come on. He told me, "It's only money." Yeah ... we'll get back to you on that one when he doesn't have any more..

For Christmas Tyler wants this game ... Leisure Suit Larry: Magna Cum Laude. I am not going to act all high and mighty and be, "Oh that is so offensive!" because, while it most likely is crude and offensive, it is a game. And he is 24 years-old. Now, this does not necessarily mean I am going to buy it for him. Fifty bucks? Yeah, I have more important things to do with $50. Like pay bills and that crap. Because we have them. Lots of them.

By no fault of my own, I over heard part of my boss's phone conversation Monday about some changes taking place in the plant. My job sounds like it could be in jeopardy. Jobs responsibilites are getting changed around and/or eliminated, and since mine is not overly important, I am a little worried. But ... every time my boss starts talking about the future, she always includes me in the where's, what's, when's, and how's. Hopefully that is a good sign.

Snow. I don't necessarily hate it, but I am not too happy about the fact that it is snowing right this instant. I dislike driving on snow and ice. In fact, in high school I just did not do it. If I ever wanted to go out, I would always bum a ride with Kevin. Of course it didn't hurt that he had a brand new Mustang at the time.

The holiday officially started Wednesday afternoon when I got off work, and did not end until 4PM this afternoon. I was home for about six or seven hours total, minus sleeping time, the whole weekend. Thursday Tyler and I made the rounds, first at my grandpa's and then at his sister's. We left at about 9 that morning and did not get home until 7 that night. Friday we went over to see my grandma and were over there all day. Tyler does not believe in shopping on the day after Thanksgiving, the sales!!, but I did manage to slip into WalMart for a few things. Saturday I spent the day, again, at Tyler's sister's while he was out playing football all afternoon with some of his old high school buddies. Today we went to Topeka to do some more Christmas shopping, and again we were gone all day. It feels good to be home.

We did not get a whole lot done Christmas shopping wise. Just a few things. I was only able to cross two people off of my list. I think I am making my mom a blanket (which means I should have started by now). I have no clue what to get half of the people on my list, and the rest I do know what I want to get, I just cannot afford it. I hate being broke.

Between all of that running around I did manage to "do" a few votive holders and juice glasses. I'll post pictures tomorrow sometime. Right now they are drying, and one of them needs to be gone over again. Tyler has talked about getting me a Dremel for Christmas, and that will makes things so much easier. We looked at a couple today, but I told Tyler that he had better talk to Dad before picking out one for sure. Dad knows more about tools than I do.

Being broke sucks. I am tired of being broke. No matter what Tyler and I do, we cannot seem to get out of the whole. I could ask for more hours, but I would have to hire a babysitter for those extra hours, and in essence would be working to pay the babysitter. To me that just does not make sense. Tyler works a ton of overtime and we really watch what we spend, but (especially at this time of year) it does not seem to do any good. We just keep thinking that if we can make it through the end of the year and then put our tax returns to good use, maybe we'll be in the clear for a while. And maybe by then we'll have figured out a way to stay in the black. I do not know where the money goes. But it sure goes fast where ever it is going.

Tuesday is DDay for having my projects ready for the Gifts From The Heart store. I have my "quota" for my contract, but I was hoping to have a lot more to take up. They told me I could bring up more as I get it done, so I guess I should probably get to work on it, eh? My only problem right now is that my printer shot craps and I need to print off labels yet before I take the stuff up to them. That means I will have to invade mom and dad's for a while tomorrow to get everything printed off. Why do I always wait until the last minute?

Milk is a man. It has to be to wreak so much havock on my insides. And still, I indulge because deep down I have an affinity for pain. Somewhere between awake and lalaland I felt the need to eat, perhaps since I had only done it once today. I cannot say for sure. Anyway, I dragged myself out of bed in search of food. The search was short, as I had gone grocery shopping on Sunday. The cupboards are stocked, as is the fridge, and still I pick the one thing I knew would keep me up all night, writhing in pain and discomfort. Milk. Waffle Crisp cereal with milk in fact. My demise. Will I ever learn my lesson? I am 21 years-old and haven't yet. You do the math.

This weekend was filled with much money spending splendor. Jonathan's holiday pictures, Hobby Lobby (not the whole store, but enough of it to be considered a share holder), and, of course, WalMart. While browsing Walden Books with Tyler's sister and brother-in-law, I rediscovered the joy of being humiliated in public by family (or in this case pseudo family). How we ended up in the "adult" section is beyond me, but ultimately the book "Tickle His Pickle" was removed from the shelf and quote by Tyler's sister. In front of her five year-old son. I'm not one to question others' parenting, but listening to "tickle his pickle" repeatedly from the mouth of a five year-old ... I chose to imagine it all a dream. No, of course I am not with those weird people who are reading sex books to their five year-old. I just ended up in the wrong aisle by mistake.

Tonight my younger sister (note I do not say little because she dwarfs me by several inches) had a basketball game against a team that has long been rivals with her school. One girl in particular was sporting quite an attitude and just plain getting on my nerves. Of course, she was posting up against my big-little sister, stirring emotions even more. By half-time, I was rooting for her to get her front teeth knocked out. During that half-time break I went for munchies and nearly missed running into my jackass banker. Once back at my seat I look over the other team's roster to see which was his kid and guess what ... it was the snot I already did not like. Because I am a bitch, and for no other good reason, I started willing my sister to throw an elbow here and there, but to no avail.

Here is where I would post pictures of the men in my life, but the camera is out in the living room, the USB port is in the dining room, and I am in the bedroom. That entails way too much walking considering the milk derived pain I am in. Hell, I can barely roll over to grab my water bottle without yelping in pain. I ... am ... a ... wuss. I've never denied it. I have little to no tolerance for pain. And yet ... I delivered my son with no drugs. Walking contradiction yes I am.

Now, do not get me wrong. I did not have a bad childhood. I had a GREAT childhood, especially compared to some. But I never really thought of myself as spoiled. Sometimes I would get the things I wanted, and sometimes I would not. My parents are flat out awesome, and I only wish I could make my sisters see how great they have it. But I can't.

Anyway, so I never thought of myself as spoiled, until tonight. I went to the casino with Tyler. He and his buddies play in a poker tournament hosted there each Thursday, and I thought I would tag along this week. First off we all had this HUGE steak dinner FOR FREEEEEEE!, which was so delicious. Then, I sat down at several different slot machines and threw money away like I had it. Which I don't. To take a break from all of the money losing, I mosied over to the gift shop. Heaven. They had all of these gorgeous porceline dolls, adorable gift card sets, trinkets, shirts, etc. And rings. Sterling silver, $15-$45 rings, but they were so pretty! There was one, though, that had me drooling as I wandered back out onto the floor. It had the silver band with two CZ "diamonds", and a blue stone in the middle. I later found that the blue stone is a "Star of India". It has this cross hair in the middle of it that moves when you move the ring. Too fucking cool! When Tyler came out of the poker room for his "half-time" break, I casually mentioned the ring, and even took him back in there to show it to him. [hint, hint] He went back to his tournament, I went back to losing money. Eventually Tyler lost out of the tournament. He came and found me, took me back into the gift shop, and bought me the ring! How cool is my fiance? I know, you don't have to tell me. He rocks.

He rocks for more reasons than just buying me stuff, though. Yesterday Jonathan had his immunizations. Six shots total. I am the biggest chicken shit ever and cannot hold Jonathan while he is getting shots, so Tyler did it for me. And I kind of felt bad afterwards because Jonathan came straight to me then, and did not want to go to Tyler. I guess he kind of associated him with the shots.

Jonathan woke up with a 102 degree fever this morning, though, and that sucks ass. I am pretty sure it was just from his shots, though, because other than that he has not acted sick. Some Children's Motrin and he was as good as new. That stuff is like gold when he has a fever.

Back in the day (okay, five or so years ago) I was what is referred to as a teenybopper. I was a big fan on the group Nsync. We are talking every CD their name graced was in my possession. I even attend a concert or two. Poster ... yeah, I had posters. Dolls. [looks around coyly] Only one or two or five. I went all out and here and now I am openly admitting it.

I have long since out grown them, and the whole phase in general.

But I kind of miss it. There is something so innocent in being so wholly enthralled with a singer, band, etc. that you spend all of your time and money feeding your "habit". I was not alone in my admiration, if you will, of Nsync, and we all thought we were going to marry one, or all (we dreamt big) of the members of the group.

I have no idea what possessed me to admit that. Eh.

Scott Peterson was found guilty.

Boss Lady let me leave work a little early today because she was also leaving early. To go hunting. Because that is what women from Nebraska do (or so I have been told, not being from Nebraska myself). She was all excited and practically skipping around once 2:00 came around. I really think she and Tyler would get along. He's been wanting to go hunting forever now. I personally do not see the appeal, but oh well. No one is making me go out there and shoot, so I am okay.

Tyler and I watched "Jersey Girl" yesterday. Too cute. I was about bawling when he yells at the little girl, and at the end when George Karlin's character is like, "I'm not afraid to live alone, it is the dying alone ..." We also rented "Saved" with Mandy Moore. Ugh. I lost interest about fifteen minutes into it. I'm sure the story was quite interesting, but it was just the way that the movie was put together. [shrugs] I wasn't impressed with it. AND we rented "Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen" because, in all honesty, there just wasn't anything else that look remotely interesting. The only good part of the movie was Adam Garcia, and even then he didn't look the greatest. He plays a good drunk, though, and that accent ... [sigh]

Tyler is trying to get me to go to the casino with him tomorrow, but we cannot find a babysitter.

I really have nothing new to report (surprise, surprise). Things are still going incredibly slow at work. I am still working like crazy to get things done for the Gifts From The Heart store. I am working on another crocheted baby blanket, and possibly some super soft fleece ones. If we had money I would make Tyler take me to Hobby Lobby or JoAnn's this weekend, but eh ... we are so broke.

Jonathan learned how to climb out of his crib today. Well ... fall would actually be more acurate. But tonight he was throwing a fit after I laid him down, so I went in to check on him and he had one leg draped over the side and was just about to push himself over when I came in the door. I have no idea what I am going to do with that child. [sigh]

This makes me very happy. I love me some 'Hawks, especially basketball. Although, the whole KU beating KSU in football thing was pretty fucking awesome.

The supervisor at work that was kind of giving me a hard time here and there was fired this morning. Boss Lady was all upset because they were friends and she was the one that had to do the firing. It had to be done, though, because this particular supervisor was not getting her work done. I wish I could say I was almost happy about it, but I'm not. I am already taking on several of her duties and I have to spend a lot more time down in the lab than I would prefer, but what are you gonna do, right?

Cabbage Patch Kids are back! I so want one. My sisters and I have probably ten at mom and dad's. I used to love CPK dolls. I have been looking at the stock at WalMart and watching for one that has Tyler, Jonathan, or my birthday, but so far no luck. Plus they are $30 and um, hello, that is expensive for a doll. Oh well.

Made some new earrings tonight. Too lazy to post pictures right now.

Tyler and I took Jonathan over to see Grandma today. She had been having fainting spells again, so we have all been trying to get over there as often as possible. She said that someone had been there everyday for a week now. She was getting suspicious. Anyway, Jonathan got into her cupboards and tried to eat some tealights. That was about the highlight of the day.

The weekends go so fast anymore, it's not funny. Saturday Tyler and I rented "The Juntion Boys" and "The Whole Ten Yards". (I love Matthew Perry) Today, we visited Grandma. Real exciting. Next weekend will be more grandparent visiting and HOUSE CLEANING. My house is such as mess.

The unfortunate timing of children is uncanny. Today I got home from work at approximately 2:45pm. Jonathan had just laid down for his nap, so I thought I had plenty of time to get my "lunch" before I had to deal with him. I piddled around, changed out of my work clothes, and put the rest of the spaghetti on the stove to reheat. Once the delicious aroma filled the kitchen I piled some on a plate. No lie, my mouth started watering. Just as I lifted the first bite to my lips ...

Mooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

In all reality it took me only ten minutes to heat the spaghetti, but thinking I had plenty of time it had actually taken me closer to thirty minutes.

So there I am, most unattractively shoveling pasta in my mouth, half hoping he would wake Tyler up so I could enjoy my "lunch", half hoping he would not wake Tyler because ... well, he has to sleep for work. I finish what was on my plate, toss it aside and dash into Jonathan's room, only to find him sitting there quietly playing. As if he had heard me coming and thought, "I disrupted her lunch, now I can go back to being good."

The child who once acted like maybe he was going to be a little behind developmentally has now surpassed my expectations tenfold. He has had a runny nose for a day or so now, and has been surprisingly good about letting me wipe it. Today, however, I leaned over and put the tissue to his nose and ... he blew his nose! My fourteen month old blew his nose. I about fell on my ass. He looks at me and grins, then leans into the tissue and does it again. Smart ass!

Later on in the evening he began fussing, which is not unusually, but nothing seemed to satisfy him. He kept grabbing at my bottle of pop, so I went to give him a drink and he grabbed the bottle out of my hands, tipped it up and commensed to chug like a pro. No gagging or spilling. I do not know what has gotten into this kid. Is he mine?

I ask myself that question quite often, honestly. You must remember, he is the spawn of the spawn of Satan (Tyler's mom), and this has to explain the current fit of temper tantrums we have been dealing with. I never did such a thing when I was his age.

Anywho, I have almost made it through three full weeks of work. Time has really been flying. And it has been interesting.

( Click here for dirty story. Do not click if you will be easily offended. )

I have made some friends already. One of the coolest people there is out IT (tech) guy. He is a riot, not to mention a computer genius, and probably the only person besides Boss Lady who actually remembers my name. Okay, I take that back. A few others remember my name, too, but only because they love to tease me. Oh well ... such is my life.

Now, I must sleep.